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news
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for previously archived news article pages, visit the news archive page (click on the button above)
recent fun news articles |
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gallic oeno-electronics - the auroran sunset
A new French invention, combining their love of wine with their keenesss for new technologies - the WineUSB. Plug this specialist USB key into your computer and download the wine of your choice.
This is a French device, on a French page, written and spoken in French. However, the video is pretty self-explanatory. The “Click Here and test for free” button (under the video on the page) has an amusing message - “Download cancelled. Very happily, this is a pure fiction! However, our engineers have tried everything to make this technology work. Now don’t wait for the official release of the USBWine in 2239 to buy our wines from source at the best prices.” It is suggested that, in the meantime, those interested sign up to a wine club called 1Vin1Jour - one wine one day - to buy wine direct from vineyards (domains). the web address for the article above is |
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a new interpretation of albert camus - from the auroran sunset
Ozy and Millie are two primary school furballs. Ozy is a zen master [he’s the one with the hat on; you’ll have to look at other strips to appreciate his zenness] who is ever tolerant of his surreally hyperactive friend Millie. One my favourite comic strips. the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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the best crop circles of 2007 - the auroran sunset
Video called Crop circle complexity: A satellite crop-circle voyage around Europe with Google Earth: How to make them: the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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french protest songs - the auroran sunset The public transport unions in France have, over the years, bullied their way to some impressive privileges for what is a very simple job with short hours. Amongst other things, they retire up to ten years before the age that is generally allowed for state pensions. At the same time their pensions are based on a much more favourable calculation. One of the first reforms proposed by the new French president, Nicolas Sarkozy, is to end these “special regimes”. So, starting this summer, the transport unions have resumed their usual bully tactics which have worked so many times before - the reason that they gained these undeserved privileges in the first place. As the last song below says, they did this in the 60s, in the 90s, and in 2005 there were 460 industrial actions against the SNCF [State railway company] alone. There are at least two other major state companies involved: the RATP [Paris region light railway and metro] and EDF [state electric company - most French trains are electric]. You may also hear the initials CGT, which refers to the transport union. However, this time there is a difference. Whereas before, the French public supported them, the strikers are now extremely unpopular in a country that is very proud of their revolutionary abolition of privileges. Whereas before, ‘fraternity’ was used to suppport these extortionists, it is now used against the strikers whose privileges are paid for out of the overdrawn national pension scheme. Just as with Margaret Thatcher and the miners, the tide seems to be turning. During these latest strikes, after the first few days, around 70% had returned to work. However, the disruption continued because someting like 70% of the drivers, the ones with the greatest privileges, remained on strike. An indication of just how unpopular the cheminots [train drivers] have become are the satirical songs that are spreading through the French web community. Here are three of the best that we have found so far.
A couple of Brits singing about the strikes: “everyone’s on strike except the hookers”. The pair live in Paris and put a topical song in French each Sunday on their website.
This singer, Mathieu Mireille, is a satire on another French singer, Mireille Mathieu [in French], very popular in the 1960s and 70s, and still called in to sing at French significant occasions like the sixtieth anniversary of the Liberation of Paris, or to sing the French song at the centenary celebrations for the Statue of Liberty.
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Canned oxygen in four flavours:
Only $23 for 17.6 grams!!! you just can’t miss out.
P.S. safety note - illegal on aircraft J And an alternative substitute for skinflints - hang a pine cone from your nose! the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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genetic manipulation of fear - the auroran sunset
It seems fear of cats in mice is a genetic smell ‘problem’ Coming soon, three new soon-to-be-extinct genetically-engineered breeds:
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Make your shiny, prsitine car less attracrtive to car thieves - add some
rust!
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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support the right to bear names
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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national flags showing weapons of war, conflict and torture Several countries have weapons of war, conflict and torture on their flags.
Note that many of these items are in coats of arms. Perhaps ‘coat of arms’ almost makes a separate category. Thanks to FACE and Martin Dann for providing some help. the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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architectural proposals for paris - Xavier The Mayor of Paris, Bertrand Delanoë, has asked several architects to design new mixed-use buildings, including tower blocks, to put at several locations around the Paris ring road - the Périphérique.
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Snowflakes form in clouds, when water vapor condenses directly into ice, the flake starting as a tiny frozen water droplet. Further water condensing causes a crystal, that often becomes increasingly complex, to grow. The growing flake is blown around inside the cloud at random and it passes through areas of different temperatures and humidity, continuing to grow in a hexagonal form. As the flake becomes larger, arms start to grow. The flake grows differently according to the surrounding temperature. Thin plates and stars are made at about -2°C/28°F. Columns and slim needles grow at about -5°C/23°F. At about -15°C/5°F, plates and stars again form. At about -30°C/-22°F form a combination of plates and columns. We link to a Java applet which simulates snowflake growth. You can play with the applet to create your own snowflakes. Here are some images from the applet:
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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breaking news: brown the clown sets up a plastic bag hot-line All citizens of the People’s Socialist Republic of the United Nation of Ingland can now report sightings of discarded plastic bags to the new Green Hotline. GPS is to be included in all new mobile phones in order that you may send the local position of the bag to your civic rapid response teams. For each bag reported, you will get a free refund of 1p on your TV licence. If you can also identify the source of the bag, you will get 2p. Each report will be placed on a secure government database and will effect your future promotion prospects, your benefits and your final pension. A 10p tax on each can of baked beans will be granted to pay for this new initiative. the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Midway Island, an atoll poking up out of the middle of the Pacific Ocean, midway between the USA and Japan, was an American military base and staging post for reaching Asia. It is now a wildlife sanctuary. Its most well-known inhabitants are the gooney birds, who also use the atoll as a staging post. Gooney is a sailors’ name for the albatross, ‘gooney’ coming from goon or simpleton.Gooney birds are, in fact, Laysan Albatross [Diomedea immutabilis]. When there was a US Airforce base, there was considerable problems with the ’planes sharing the gooney birds’ airspace. The website from which the photo on the right came has a recording of gooney bird sounds, as well as many photos of the island. Note that the gooney bird throws its head back as pictured,
as part of its courtship dance, and emits a cow-like moo [recording available at linked website].
Other courtship sounds include rapid beak-clacking. Statue of a Gooney Bird on Midway Island.
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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on the ‘great drug war’ - ron paul - hilarity
the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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agw may have been categorically disproved
The hoax article was at this link, but currently has been pulled. the web address for the article above is | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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© abelard, 2007, 12 november variable words |
